blogging

This is blog day!

Blog Day 2007

Today is blog day. What’s that? Well, it’s the occasion to present five blogs that you find interesting. And especially some new ones you discover recently.

So, here’s my list:

1. mister peace. I found this blog through another one very recently, and I can’t stop giggling at all his stories. A brief description? His random thoughts about everything. I won’t see my hairdresser the same way next time I will pay a visit to her.

2. Liz. An incredibly generous blogger, because you don’t get one, but two blogs with her. Thanks to her, I’m thinking twice now before shaving my armpits. And I discover Greg Patillo.

3. Lola Lyndon. I’m a total addict for beautiful and artistic pictures. I bow down to this artist.

4. Eleanor. I just love how she manages to write her posts about love and everything around it, with a lot of researches.

5. The rut. Little cartoons very funny.

So, spread around 😀

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life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

Head like a hole

WARNING: This post IS NOT MEANT to MOCK MEN. Don’t feel personally offended.

I bumped recently into a guy who used to be one of my classmates back in College. We used to hang out a lot with our group, but quickly parted ways because there was in the group a guy I really couldn’t stand. This douche used to date one of my ex-friends, who started to ignore all her female friends because “we weren’t worth it” in the eyes of the object of her affection. But apparently, they have broken up and he’s getting married to another woman in the coming months.

Some people choose to sacrifice their friends because their partner couldn’t stand them, and that’s a shame. Generally, the object of their affection is jealous and possessive, and doesn’t want his/her partner to see other people than him/her. But sometimes, their motivation is different and only concerns one particular person. “J.F. used to be my best friend, but when he started dating her future wife, he just ignored me. I learned later that she couldn’t stand me because she feared I would steal her man away from her. The truth is, six months before they started dating, I kissed him when I was drunk, but it didn’t go further because I didn’t want it.  This situation is strange, because I understand her”explains K., 28.

A friend of mine told me a similar story with her former BFF. “We used to be attached by the hip when we were teenagers, but she started to slowly ignoring me when she dated this jerk. He didn’t like me at all, for him, I was just a brainiac not cool at all, and back then, you were considered as a loser if you were friend with me” she said. “But I had the impression he was jealous of the bond we had with my former BFF” she added.

Finding your soul mate can be really difficult, so what if he/she doesn’t like all your friends or just your best friend? Would you sacrifice your friends for him/her? Would you just dump your soul mate or tell him/her to accept your friend despite his/her feelings?

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broken heart, dating site, life, love, men, miscellaneous, relationships, sex, thoughts, women

First it giveth, then taketh it away

When you search for a relationship (based or not on love) on the multiple dating sites existing nowadays, you could fall on women/men looking for a marriage with a foreigner to escape the misery of their country, swinging couples looking for more to exchange, single men/women looking only to get laid, true love, potential friends, but also married or already engaged people, especially married men.

One of my single friends told me she realised she chatted with one of her colleague’s husband on of of those dating sites, and she immediately stopped replying to his numerous messages. “I can’t believe how many married men I’ve met on those dating sites, but the worst was that I knew almost all of them and this is really scaring” she said.

The dating sites give to the unfaithtful married men an enormous field for cruising. “If you’re really careful, you can get tons and tons of dates with total strangers on those dating sites. It’s easier to find a mistress on those sites than on the street or in your entourage. In these two last cases, chances are someone you know or knows your wife would see you flirting with other women. Internet gives you the confidentiality you need” explains P., 40.

This confidentiality would explain why married men multiply on the dating sites. I met once a woman who told me about her painful experience with this phenomenon. “I met J. on a famous dating site and we immediately clicked. I was already in love before even meeting him face to face. After six months of dating, we decided to get married. But one day, I started having suspicion on him: what if he didn’t stop talking online to other women? I wanted to set the record straight, so I created a false profile and waited for him to contact me. And he did. He didn’t change his name at all, so it was easy to uncover him. And to my surprise, he started to explain his real situation. He told me he had enough of lying to everyone, that he was married and he had a little daughter, but was also engaged with another woman. I didn’t have the courage to told him my real identity, and just disappeared from his life straight away without a word of explanation. Now, I can’t trust men anymore, and I don’t think I would again” she said.

This is the harsh reality of dating sites. It’s not very different from the “real life”, when you think about it. I still believe, though, it is possible to find your soul mate on those sites (and sometimes, even celebrities). But you’ve got to be really, really lucky (and patient). On the other hand, it is a really good mean for those who just want to get laid.

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humor, men, miscellaneous, Music, thoughts

You got to be kidding me?

This is completely  out of my usual subjects, but I came accidentally on this chart , consisting of the  top 100 metal vocalists of all time. And I’m pissed.

Jonathan Davis? A vocalist?

And since when Fred Durst has learned to actually sing?

Maynard only made it at n°21, behind that douche that is Jonathan Davis    😥

 And Mike Patton isn’t mentioned at all.    

This guy is nuts, that’s sure. But I love him.

I’m sorry in advance for your poor delicate ears…

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humor, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

Underneath your clothes

When you dress yourself, you should consider checking every detail of your outfits, including your underwear.  Some people don’t think enough about it, but it is really important because it’s the last barrier that separates you from your nudity. And it’s also the last piece of clothes your partner sees before you go completely naked.

Whether you like it or not, underwear is always associated with something like morality, sensuousness, cleanliness, sexuality, hygiene or social status. Like the rest of our clothes. But some people think it’s OK to take care of the exterior package and neglect the underwear. And that’s where they’re wrong.

When we got into the bedroom, we started to take all our clothes off. He stripped down to his undies, and my desire just disappeared straight away. He was wearing a totally worn out brief, even though on the outside, he was really well dressed. This just turned me off. I pretended I had to go the bathroom, took my clothes and just ran away” L., 34, told me. “I didn’t know why, but I imagined him as a Homer Simpson, laying like a potato couch in his dirty underwear in front of the TV” she added.

The choice of underwear is also important. “I hate briefs, I have the impression I date an old man and therefore, it makes me feel old” K., 32, said. “I will run away if the guy wears a thong. Geez, it’s horrible and ridiculous” I. 34, explains. “I can’t stand shorts. You can see through his trouser that everything is hanging freely, and I can’t stand that view” H., 33, said.

But then, it’s a question of personal taste.

Besides, you can change your underwear. “When I met my husband, he was wearing those ridiculous shorts with comics charachters on it. These were really childish. I told him I didn’t like those at all  and he agreed to go with me and  buy new boxers for him. He threw away his old boxers, to my great satisfaction” O., 35, said.

So, do you make attention to men’s underwear (panties, that is), and what should he not wear? For the men, do you make attention to women’s undies. And what should she not wear? 

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broken heart, celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

Sooner or later…

you’re gonna hate it.

Living together with your partner can be challenging. For some women, it’s a piece of cake. But for others, well, it can turn into a nightmare. Some couples even refuse to live together, because they fear their passion would fade away, like in the book Belle du Seigneur.

Most of my friends who moved in with their partners agree however on one thing: the most difficult part of living together is the first months of cohabitation. After that, you enter a new phase for your couple,”where all the mystery is gone“, where everything goes more or less smooth. “There’s a kind of routine that has installed itself in your relationship. You split the household chores in two and you try to stick to it. Of course, tensions come always from these,  if one of the partners is lazy” says one of my friends.

Many of the single persons I’ve met told me that the household chores are one thing they can’t stand in the cohabitation. “I cannot see myself cooking for the two of us, ironing his shirts, cleaning the house, be a perfect Bree Van De Kamp” says Y., 31. “I lived before with my ex, but I couldn’t stand anymore him inviting his friends all over, then having to clean the mess after them. I felt like a domestic, and I hate this” declared I., 34.

For sure, living with your partner can be quite challenging, especially if you don’t share some common points like for example the love of organization and tidying. P., 35, confesses she’s untidy (I can’t blame her for this) while her husband is a real maniac of organization. “Everything has its own place in the house. We often fight or I must say he often yells at me because I let things all over the place. And it always ends up like this: I finish to clean my mess ,at least, I hide things out of his sight”  she told me.   

Then, there’s the cooking and cleaning. Another hurdles… What do you do when you’re a really bad cook? “Luckily for me, my man knows how to cook. I can’t cook anything, even fried eggs. I managed to burn them the last time I tried” K., 34, explains. “It’s not that I don’t cook. It’s just that cooking for me is making cakes and cookies, and nothing else, a bit like Izzie in Grey’s anatomy”A., 29, said. “We go often to the restaurant, and he tries to cook ” replies L., 34.

Then, the cleaning part. “I had the horrible feeling I became like a domestic for him, always cleaning his mess. One day, I had enough, and I threatened to leave him if he doesn’t hire a cleaning lady. And he did” J., 30, said. “I’m the one who cleans the house, but he’s the one who criticizes everything I do. He’s the first to notice every detail of dirt I forget, and it gets me mad. So, when it happens, I just leave him finishing the job – after a huge fight”K., 34, explains.

The word “compromise” is really helpful when you live with your partner. It helps you dealing with the charges that go hand in hand with cohabitation. However, each partner must try to give a hand to get a balance. If one of the two doesn’t do everything while the other does, that’s where the war begins. “He didn’t lift a finger for me. I work hard, I take care of all the household chores, and he wasn’t grateful at all for all of this. He used to be unemployed and hang everyday at home in his pyjama. When I came late from work, I just found all the mess he left during the day, and the first thing he said to me when I came home was” What are we going to eat tonight?” I couldn’t take it anymore and told him to leave the apartment” T. 39, said.

Do you think living with your partner is (sometimes) difficult? And why?

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celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, wacky, women

Women on top

Recently, my chief editor and 49 other women of my country have been elected as the “50 most influential women” of my country. Since in my newspaper, we knew pretty much all of them professionally (and sometimes more), some of my colleagues just joked about one thing: these women were also the ones who, for the most of them, have a poor love life. My chief editor isn’t spoiled in her love life. Since she divorced from her husband ten years ago, we have barely known her with a new man (and some journalists complain she would need a good shag because she’s such a b…).

Clearly, most of them have sacrified everything to their career. Among the 49 other ladies mentioned in the list, there was also a chief editor from another media, who makes our boss look a little lamb next to her. All the journalists who work, have worked, worked with her confirm she has sacrified everything to her career. She has no friends, no man, no social life, and she deserved truly the title of male-deflecting harpy.

She used to date a journalist from my newspaper, who quickly left her because he couldn’t stand her anymore. Everyone who knows her and him still wonders why he just fell for her. Objectively, she’s not repelling at all physically. But her charachter is such a pain in the ass that no sensible man dares to stay with her. She throws tantrum all the time, she’s jealous, mean with everyone except her boss. Everyone agrees she would need a therapy right now, but she refuses.

In her case, it’s not her career who stands as a hurdle for her relationships. Everyone agrees that she just jumps into her career to avoid the other disastrous parts of her life. I just feel pity for her.

When you work from 8 am to 10 pm and over a day, it’s really difficult to maintain a social life. I’ve met numerous traders in the City of London who complained about this. So, I could easily imagine how hard to have a stable relationship in that context. I don’t even talk about having children.

I still wonder the effect of such a deprivation on your mental health on the long term. Some traders told me they don’t plan to do this all their life. Their goal is to make the most money they can and then retreat at the age of 40 (and even under) to the South of France, where life is much more easier.

How do you find a balance in all this?

 

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