One of my single friends, who just got passed her 30th birthday, always complains about her mother because she keeps on telling her to rush for getting married.”She was desperate I didn’t find the man of my life when I was in College, because she said it was the best place to find love, and after that it becomes incredibly difficult for a woman to find the right one” my friend says.
Her mother maybe right after all. When I look at my single friends or just the single women I know, I just notice how hard it is for them to find the one, or even just a lover they can get along. They have many options to find the one: going out, surfing on internet dating sites, speed-dating, blind dates, or even at work. Nevertheless, some of them always end up alone.
Why do we have a better chance to have a stable relationship with the one we met in College? That’s a tough question. At that period of your life, you’re still naive about certain things and not (yet) bitter about life. Most of the people around are still single (but not for long) , and the truth is I saw many of those couples marrying at the end of their studies, and those who didn’t find the shoes that fit their feet in College are still, for the most of them, single now.
Things are slowly evolving right now. With the people divorcing at a younger age than before and those who put work before anything else, I see many couples forming at the office and some of them even end up in a marriage. But this is mostly true if you work for a big company with a fair representation of both sexes. “ I work in a PR company where most of my colleagues are women, and the only one who’s a man is our old boss who is everything but appealling. I have zero chances to find love at work, even if I meet sometimes handsome clients. Most of the time, they’re married or not interested” confesses A.,34. “I work as an independent nurse, and the only men I meet are either old enough to be my grandfather or young with a let’s say embarrassing problem that I don’t want to share” explains N., 29.
If you don’t have the option of your office, it becomes difficult. Dating sites don’t work necessarily because the people there are not honest all the time with you. Clubs, bars, single holidays resorts aren’t a good option either if you’re not physically gifted. And even if you are, chances are the relationship wouldn’t last.
Besides, when you grow old, you become more and more difficult because you develop your own habits that are hard to break. The bachelors and spinsters who have been single for a long time find it difficult to live with their newfound love. “I was single for a period of three long years where I got used to live alone. When I moved in my man’s apartment, at the beginning, we were always fighting because I had a problem sharing my life with another person. But now, I finally accepted him” G., 35, said.
If you are (or were) single right now, what is the better place for finding the love of your life? Or do you believe in pure randomness?