As a (still) young woman, I’m not often taken seriously in my work. I see people look at me as if I was just pretty, but stupid. Luckily for me, I’ve always managed to prove them wrong. But recently, I heard the journalist rumored to be gay talking shit behind my back. It hurts, I must admit. I feel like a complete fool with him, because I tried to help him overcome a rough professional period in his career (he’s in a open-conflict with his boss). And this is how he just thanked me. I just decided to stop talking to him anymore, he doesn’t deserve this anyway. Loser.
It is really tiring to demonstrate I’m not just a pretty face around me, especially since I work in the macho financial world. But I’ve got the feeling I would always be judged by my appearance only, no matter how competent I am. Lately, this has really turned me down, and I have a problem finding motivation again. The incident with the presumed gay journalist isn’t helping my mood. I know I don’t talk a lot and keep the mystery around me, but he’s judging me on personal criteria, or stereotypes. He must be thinking I listen to crap pop music and read only gossip magazines (because I make a lot of bad jokes about Britney Spears). Lately, he was speaking with another journalist about Luciano Pavarotti’s death, and just shut up all of a sudden when I joined their conversation. He looked at me like if I didn’t know who Pavarotti was. How could I know, if I listen only to crap pop music (Opera isn’t my cup of tea either, but I studied music history when I was younger). When I first talked to him, he was just mentioning tons and tons of stereotypes about the Jews, women (who can’t drive and read a map), Swedish women (who are easy women), but I tried to believe one of my other colleagues that I really like who defended him. I should have stayed far away from him.
So D., if you ever read this, FUCK YOU (in the ass), douche.
And since I’m the queen of the fools, I should deserve a crown. Here it is.