broken heart, celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

You’re in my mind all of the time…


… I know that’s not enough

 Have you ever fallen in love with someone you know you will never have because he/she’s already taken or simply because life has decided otherwise? Once, with some of my female friends, we had a conversation on this topic. It came into our discussion because one of my friends received a phone call from her friend she was secretly in love with. She told us she never tried anything with him, because he’s taken and about to get married. “My heart races at 100 miles an hour when he’s next to me, he will always have a place in it, but I made myself a reason: he’s taken and that will never change” she said.

Another friend of mine then followed with her experience. “When I was in high school, I had a crush on my teacher. He was young, very good looking and sensible, everything I love in a man, but he was also married, and I didn’t want to be a homewrecker, so I never tried anything with him. Other girls had less scruples and dared to flirt with him, but he was really in love with his wife, and told them to find a guy of their age” she said.

Another one told us it was simply the circumstances that made the union impossible. “I met him in a seminar abroad. He was there also because his company organized a seminar. I got to know him because the groom inverted our luggage, and we had a little chat. He was everything I like in a man, charming, witty, funny, and mature. I really imagined to be with a man like him. Unfortunately, this encounter happened the day he was leaving back for his country. He was living in England. We exchanged our phone number and email address, but I knew it was useless to hang on a simple hope. I saw all the difficulties such a relationship would bring, and also, I didn’t know what he thought about me. So, I just gave up and didn’t pursue him” she said. “Besides, I knew very little about him, and I didn’t even know if he was straight or gay. I would have been silly to try to pursue him, especially since he didn’t seem that interested in me. After a few emails, we simply lost contact with each other. I guess it’s just life. He left a footprint in my heart, and I will never forget about him, though” she added.

In those situations, either you just make yourself a reason, either you decide to fight against fate. “I fell in love with my ex and tried everything to get him, although he was dating someone else. He yielded to me, and I couldn’t be much happier. We are made for each other, I don’t know why I would have given up” J., 31, said.

So, what would you do in a situation like that? Would you give up, or would you just hang on until you reach your goal?

 

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9 thoughts on “You’re in my mind all of the time…

  1. hi modobs, (sorry i didnt catch your name)

    I like this post, I’ve had the same experience…. not once, not twice, but more than 3 times.

    1st I fell in love with a guy who had a gf. (thats a start)
    2nd I fell in love with a guy who is about to get married (with another woman)
    3rd I fell in love with a guy who just got married (2 weeks before our date)
    4th I fell in love with a married guy with 2 children (claiming to be separated)

    Maybe you can have a look at my blog, with title “Follow your head or your heart”

  2. Life is a journey through hell and heaven.If you find life difficult it will be because

    of a lot of problems,some big,some small and some silly.But ther
    e in no problem without a solution.So ask balettan for solutions.

  3. Hi Anita,
    Thank you! I just looked at your blog, and you’re right, it’s never that easy. Feelings are hard to control. But why do you keep on making the same mistake?

    Hi Balettan,
    thanks for the advice!

  4. dontdatethatdude says:

    If the guy is already spoken for, seriously, not just dating, I would not pursue, but if he was available I would not let it go without putting in the effort to see if it was more than a fantasy or crush.

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