… But then came the rush of flood
We all have moments where we feel great, bloated or uploaded by confidence and then suddenly, it all falls apart because everything went wrong. An example? I had once to present a conference and it was a true catastrophe. I was expecting an audience of 20 people as the organizers told me, and instead, there were 140 people attending the conference. As soon as I started to speak and looked very rapidly at the crowd, I felt I was loosing it and panicked. I just tried to achieve my presentation, but it was really unclear and boring.
In love too, you can experiment the same sensation. This roller coaster happens a lot during the first dates with the object of our affection, because this is the key moment that determines if your relationship will last or not. “I had a date with a guy absolutely charming I met in a bar, and the D-Day, I felt a little bit floating, until the date started. I just said stupidities all the time as I was impressed by the moment, even if it never happened to me before. He looked at me with pity in his eyes, and never called me back afterwards” G., 35, said. “It looked very promising. We spent a wonderful evening together, until we switched to the bedroom, and there, I lost completely the situation. I felt paralyzed and can’t do anything. As I couldn’t relax, I couldn’t feel anything, even if he tried his best, but in the end, I just simulated everything, and I felt so ashamed I didn’t want to see him again” P.,32, said.
This can happen because we put too much hopes in a situation where we don’t have necessarily all the elements in hand. Of course, the best way to avoid this happening is to feel cool and don’t have much expectations about the future events. But it’s easier said than done. Besides, some people have a curious ability to put too much pressure on their shoulders.
So, have you ever felt disappointed by a date where you had great expectations but didn’t turn exactly like you were planning?