How does the Allegory of the cave translate into our modern relationships? I was once reading a magazine where it said that, thanks to Sex and the City, more and more women are looking for their Mr. Big. For those of you who haven’t seen this series, the plot summarizes as followed: Carrie Bradshaw and Mr. Big are an on-and-off couple who can’t live without each other, yet suffer a lot when they’re together, because she’s insecure and doubts a lot about his feelings, while he, an allergic to commitment, is a bit frightened by her reactions. In other words, this is a masochist relationship, where each of the characters yields to an intense passion.
Is that what we all want, passion? I believe that love should be a light feeling, not a heavy one. When I ask around me for an opinion about this topic, this is what I get:
“I don’t want drama in my love life, so a roller coaster of feelings is something I would avoid at any price in my relationships. When it gets too complicated, I tend to leave. I hate this” P., 35, said.
“I like it when I have the impression to live a fairy tales. So, in a sense, I could say that I like passion in a relationship. But it depends on how you define passion. If it’s something that tearing you down all the time, I don’t call it passion. If the feelings involved are intense, this is more my definition. I don’t mind fights if these are a foreplay for a sweet moment afterwards, but not fights where you end up crying because your partner told you all he dislike about you” Y., 36, said.
“Yes, I need passion in my relationships, otherwise, I get bored easily. This is what makes me feel alive, that validates my existence” I.,37, said.
Besides, when I ask around me which lover people will always remember, I get a different answer though. The person who breaks your heart or caused you mental anguish has a better chance to count more than the other partners you had, except if all of your ex’s did break your heart and caused you many worries.
So, is passion an important component of a relationship for you?