Recently, I went to the wedding of one of my friends. Her husband and her have known each other for years but they didn’t like each other at first. Both have a tempestuous charachter, and when they first met, it didn’t go so smooth. At least, from my friend’s side, it wasn’t the case. She told me he was quite rude with her, and that she felt forced to answer that back to him. They were coworkers, and had to work together. So, she felt forced to try to be nice to him despite this disastrous meeting. She didn’t know he was genuinely fond of her, and that his rudeness was just a defensive mechanism because he felt she didn’t like him. On the other hand, she thought he was talking shit behind her back, and she acted very cautiously with him. She was pissed all of the time with him, until they had their Christmas Party at work. Ah, those Christmas Parties! Mine are always filled with drama, odd couples, stupid behaviours,… Hers wasn’t so different. Her coworker got drunk during the party, and at the end of the evening, he jumped on the bar, and shouted out loud how beautiful, intelligent and lovely she was. He added that she could be the woman of his life, if only she would dare opening her heart to him. My friend was petrified. She left the party, and got pissed he embarrassed her like that in front of everyone. The next morning, just before she arrived at work, she received an SMS from him, asking her to have a coffee together before starting the day. She accepted. There, at the coffee shop, he apologized to her for being such a fool. He didn’t add anything more. She thought he was simply too drunk and said stupid things. Yet, she told me she felt disappointed he didn’t confirm to her what he said at the party. She felt like a fool too. The next days, they spent their time avoiding carefully each other, but everyone at work noticed that there was something going on between them. They didn’t make a move until one day, one of their coworkers invited everyone for his retirement party. They didn’t drink during the night, despite of all of their colleagues getting drunk. Instead, they ended up chatting with each other outside the room, and what happened happened.
They didn’t choose the easy way to fall in love with each other. But each of us tend to barricade ourselves when we fall in love with someone. We don’t want to have our heart broken, so we put a lot of tests to our potential partner. Lies are common to avoid revealing our feelings too much, too soon. It’s just that we have to tell the truth about our love in the right moment. If we don’t, it can be too late.
Sometimes, we even lie to ourselves about the feeling we have for a special someone. This can occur because the person is already taken. For example, a married man, or your best friend’s lover. This can also happen you’re already involved in another relationship. And it can happen that both of you are involved in another relationship. So, we lie to ourselves because we don’t want to ruin anything and feel guilty about it. But some people prefer following their heart in this case.
The big question here is deciphering the truth, when our lover doesn’t make it easy to understand. Sometimes, a little help from alcohol, or another person, is needed. Sometimes, signs speak for themselves.
So, can you easily tell when people are lying to you?