Last edited by modobs on August 29, 2009 at 2:10 pm
Recently, I had a long conversation with one of my friends, who just got dumped. She feared she would never find her significant other. But when I ask her why she couldn’t, she replied that it is because of her.”I expect too much from my relationships, and I got hugely disappointed every time, because my man cannot fulfill what I need from him, and I get very critic against that” she said. Since I know her, she hasn’t loved herself that much. And this is her major problem in every relationship she has had so far.
When we wish too much for something to happen, not only chances are this would never happen, but also we can get hugely disappointed if this doesn’t turn out to be exactly we wished for. But it’s not easy to depart from this kind of wishes. Especially when you’re a dreamer.
With my friend, we might have found a solution. We have known each other for years, and yet, even if I’m not perfect, I have never disappointed her on the long term. I asked her why, and if she also acts like that with other people. And she replied that she learned to let it slide with us. We did have many fights at the beginning because I couldn’t attend a party where she invited me or missed a promise I made to her. But each time, I have apologized. And as she grows old, she tends to not get bitter if I don’t do what she wants. I just told her to drop her expectations, that nobody’s perfect. I also told her to love herself a little bit more. This could clearly make the difference.
Besides, like my grandmother said, “you have to act with him as if you don’t give a damn“. I guess she had it right.
So, do you expect too much from your relationships?