Once, we had a conversation with some of my friends about what’s defining a couple. Nowadays, when we look around us, there is no universal rule for this definition.
Many couples I know live together, have children together, go on holidays together. Yet, there are couples I know who don’t go on holidays together, don’t live together, and choose to pick a father/mother for their child because they don’t feel able to do this on their own.
One of my friends, who lives separately from her fiancee, says she chose this option because it has saved their couple. They did try to live together. But it was a catastrophe. Now, she says they only share the good part of the couple, aka the one without household chores, storage, stupid decision about decoration,…She’s also convinced that routine kills the romance.
One of my acquaintances is also convinced about this. That’s why she chose to live in a separate apartment from her man. They both have children, and live with them. They try to see each other as much as possible, but apart from their home.
Another of my friends chose to live with a married man who’s not her lover, just her best friend, with his wife’s blessing. She said that after her friend and wife spent one year living together, they decided to live separately again, but this doesn’t mean they’re breaking up.
There’s no manual for living together, we don’t teach that in school, always says one of my coworkers. Maybe this explains why some people choose to distance themselves from the classical form of the couple.
Does it mean it’s the best way to have a sustainable couple? I don’t know. I guess if both parties agree on how their couple should work, then it’s ok. But it’s important to know what you want in your relationship first.
So, do you think living together is a living hell?