Long after our relationship ended, we can still feel a little bit protective toward our ex. Jealousy is no longer on the menu, and both of us has moved on. Yet, we can’t help watching our ex, to see if she/he’s doing okay just by kindness.
One of my ex’s and I have managed to remain friends throughout the years, even if there’s an ocean separating us. I don’t get news from him very often, and we don’t speak to each other very often. Yet, we never forget each other’s birthday, and if we happen to be in each other’s town, we try to have a lunch together. It’s been going on like that for almost ten years now.
He never interferes into my love life. I never interfere into his either. He just wants to know if I’m doing OK, and is happy for me, like I’m happy for him. And back then, I never thought we could remain friends. We had a rocky relationship, a very rocky one. We separated like a hundred times, and it ended up me leaving for another town, him leaving for another country.
I didn’t hear about him for two years, until september 11, 2001. His office was not very far from the twin towers and he got a little traumatised by this horrible event. When I saw that on TV, I immediately feared for him. I couldn’t explain why. Two days later, he called me. We spent two hours on the phone. And sent each other numerous emails.
Three weeks later, we met again. He came back in our country to see his family. And asked to see me. This is where I understood I felt nothing for him anymore, and that I only wished him the best. This is where our friendship started. There’s nothing ambiguous in this.
We needed an ocean to end our feud. I don’t know if we would have managed to get through this if we were still living in the same town. Plus, time helped us a lot. And we both moved on without seeing each other for months. I guess this helped too.
So, do you manage to stay friends with your ex?