celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

At or with me


“For a love to be unforgettable, a series of coincidences must happen immediately” said Milan Kundera in the “unbearable lightness of being”

This is how Tereza and Tomas fall in love. Because of a series of coincidences. I used to think this was pure BS, but I’ve changed my mind. Recently, a friend of mine explained how she knew her husband would be the one when they first met because they had the same thought at the same moment. It wasn’t a common thought. They were looking at one picture, where their eyes caught a blue elephant. Nobody else in the room noticed this detail. Moreover, when they exchanged their thought, they realized it was referring to a story they read when they were kids. Her grandmother, who was a writer, wrote that book. And he got this one because his father worked in the book publisher where it got edited. The book didn’t have that much success, and the publisher went bankrupt three weeks after it got published. So, very few people had the chance to read it. My friend loved that story, but had nobody to share that with. He also loved it, and knew he was the only one. When they talked about this, they were just struck by one thing: they shared a secret.

Love is a mirror. We all looked for someone who shares some common points with us. We share a lot of things with people in general. But we all have special features that makes us a little bit unique. And that only those who share that can understand. And love.

It may sound stupid, but we all do that. I remember one scene in the movie “singles” where Debbie says about the man of her dreams he had to like her earrings that nobody liked. When she finally met the guy at the end of the movie, the first thing he said to her was: “I love your earrings”. She instantly fell in love with him.

When my man and I get to know each other, after hours of talking, he revealed he had a totem when he was in a troop that was exactly the animal I picked in  a stupid game I played when I was in High School. My BFF had this game where I had to choose from various situations, various animals,… And this combination would give me the description of the man of my life.  I remained speechless when he said that. I also changed my licensed plate after my separation with my ex. And the letters and numbers on it just match exactly the birthday and initials of my man. He couldn’t believe this coincidence. Me neither.

Of course, this can be far fetched. But I know couples who are born on the same day. Couples who met while reading the same book, at the same time. Just like if destiny puts them in front of each other. These coincidences don’t necessarily mean he/she’s the right person for you. But it can be a trigger for a relationship. And it shouldn’t be ignored.

So, do you believe in destiny?

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3 thoughts on “At or with me

  1. Jennifer says:

    Yes, and I want a story like this to happen to me. I kinda think it will, if my ah, psychic instincts are on and working….

  2. Ellis I. Lee says:

    i don’t believe in destiny; i believe in coincidence…

    but whether destiny or coincidence, it’s our choices that matter.

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