broken heart, celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

The promised land

On internet, you can find a lot of sites advising you on your love life. But most of them ask you to pay for a book giving you all the tricks to seduce, winning your ex back, forget about your ex,… And these all boil down to one thing: how to manipulate the one you fancy.

Because let’s be honest, these advices are most of them temporary, and won’t work 100% of the time. Why? Simply because the one you fancy doesn’t really care about you. Some couples do get back together after a separation. But afterward, this union can go belly up again. Because what was wrong in the relationship didn’t change over time. So what’s the point of wasting your time and energy to win your ex back or seducing someone who will never yield to your advance?

It’s hard to get rejected. If you were the one at the receiving end of the break up, the emotions you face after getting rejected can make you crawl at the feet of the one who left you. It just gives him/her a power of attraction on you, because hey, we all want the things we can’t have. A friend of mine, who got dumped ten years ago by  a woman during their holidays with their friends, told me he never forgot about her because she rejected him in a very violent way (she told me he wasn’t good enough for her). Ten years later, my friend met her again at a seminar where he was the chairman, and he told me he slept with her to take his revenge on her, and then dumped her.

Reversing the situation to your advantage is difficult in that situation. If the one you love rejected you for a reason, you’d better know why rather than starting to elaborate plans to win him/her back. Because if she/he left you because you were a cheater/ player/ drugged/ violent or just simply boring/ didn’t pay enough attention to him/her, the one you love may recall every bad moment he/she had with you, and this will prevent him/her to come back to you (it’s called common sense).And if you were only his/her rebound person, there’s also very little chance that he/she will change his/her mind about you. The same goes if the one you love loves someone else.

You can try to change yourself and force you to be someone else to try to win the one you love back, but you won’t fool anyone for long.

So, instead of wasting you time reading tons of books promising you to seduce someone/ win your ex back… Maybe it’s worth focusing on yourself, or on people who really need your time and energy. Of course,  it’s important to take care of yourself and not letting yourself go. Because, like we say in French “On n’attrape pas les mouches avec du vinaigre”. It’s also important to have a social life. Because you never know what will happen. You could meet a really great person while you’re out with your friends. A really great person, who’s interested in you, who shares some common points with you, and with whom you spend a lot of great time. Unlike with your ex.

It’s comforting to go back to the past, to the things we know,which were not necessarily good  for us. But the future holds its promises too.


5 thoughts on “The promised land

  1. I really like the article.Your right,it’s comforting to go back to the past, to the things we know,which were not necessarily good for us. But the future holds its promises too.We should also have the confidence, passion and commitment to live your dreams.

  2. We cant’ always live on the past you know.It’s really up to us to make our future more bright,fulfilling and exciting. 😀

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