In “One Day“, the best-seller written by David Nicholls, the two main characters realized they love each other twenty years after they first met. They have sex on the first night , but decide to stay friends instead of lovers. He’s very successful in his career at the beginning, while she’s struggling with hers, but as time goes on, the situation reverses to her advantage.
The more confident she became with her life, the more she occupied a place in his heart.
Because that’s the way it works in a real relationship. Women should never hide behind their man. They all have to live their own life and follow their own dreams. This is also the only way to keep the flame of love alive.
Pity, desperation and self-loathing are not attractive at all. Of course, life can be a bitch and we all go through ordeals in our life. But for every down, there is an up too. And it’s good to have your life on hand, especially if things don’t turn the right way with your significant other. Because your professional and social life is a buffer for a broken heart. In itself, it can bring you happiness. And happiness is attractive. It’s a powerful weapon of seduction.
That’s why, if you’re trying to find the one you love, or to win back your ex, it’s important to have a happy life on your own.
Being happy on your own will also prevent you to fall into bad relationships. It will prevent you to hear sentences like one of my acquaintances recently heard: “I don’t want the next 10 years of my life to be like the ten last ones. I want to go out and travel with my mates“. It’s been 10 years they have been together, and she just gave birth to her second child.
Happiness and confidence in your life will also make you think twice about sacrificing it for the one you love. Because when you fought so much for one thing, you don’t want to give it all up just like that, even if you find someone new in your life . For instance, no one can ever ask me to drop my job or my friends, because both make me happy and I love them to death!
Finding love over happiness just makes you even more happy. And that’s the beauty of it. Love is a beautiful feeling, but it needs fuel to last, and that fuel is your own happiness.