celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

The needed distance


Recently, one of my coworkers told everyone in my newsroom she was going to Brazil with a friend for three months. This was a shock to everybody since she’s dating a fellow coworker who will remain here in my country. She left us yesterday and I wished her a very good trip.

Since then, I noticed on Facebook her man changed his status to “in a relationship” with her. They have been dating for almost a year now and it’s only now that he changed this.

This is not the first time she left him to travel on her own. Three months ago, she went on a trip to the Silicon Valley to meet various startup there and made a terrific report about it. But during her trip, he didn’t seem affected by her absence. This time, it’s different. Maybe this is the sign they are getting serious to each other.

Their relationship was strange to all of us. She was really jealous when he spoke to all the female journalists (the young ones) in our newsroom, especially when he was talking with me. But I consider him as one of my cousins. And I remain distant to him because I didn’t want her to get jealous, even there was no reason for that. He, on the other hand, was a bit distant to her. Until she came back from the Silicon Valley.

They fell in love at work, while both of them were dating someone else. It’s not easy to jump into a new relationship in this condition. Especially when one of them was involved in a long term relationship. He was living with his girlfriend at the time. It looked it was pretty serious. He talked about her all of the time.

She, on the other hand,  was not that committed in her previous relationship. She was even flirting a lot with many of the male journalists in my newsroom, including my previous editor, who wondered what the hell she wanted from him. Once, during a team building with her team, she got drunk and told everyone her long list of relationships. Yes, she’s a seducer.

She did her move with him, and she was very possessive with him.  She was always chasing him and he was a little bit scared about that. Everyone in my newsroom knew who lead the relationship between the two.

I guess for her, taking her distance with him was the best decision she made to make him commit a little bit more.

Being too possessive and too obsessed with your man is the best way to make him go away. It’s always better to have a rich social life on your own, so you don’t depend entirely on him to make him happy. He should be the cherry on the top of your cake. And that’s how he should feel when he’s with you.

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