broken heart, celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

The division of the heart


The person we can fall in love with can sometimes carry with him the biggest difficulty to be with. But it’s difficult to fight against our heart. And despite the difficulties, we choose to hang on. Because we know it’s him, and no one else.

Recently, a friend of mine told me her story she kept secret for years. She fell in love with a man who could jeopardize her career if their relationship went public.  Not because of him, but because of another woman, who was chasing him, but had the power to get her fired, and who could block her to find another job.

Her man was scared of that woman. She had a power on him because she knew some dirty little secrets about him. She was friend with his ex-wife.

So, my friend kept her relationship secret for years.

But secret don’t remain kept for long. And her man got scared and dumped her.

He told her he didn’t want to ruin her life.

Yet, the damage was already done.

Luckily for my friend, she received a proposal for working abroad, and she accepted right away. She got out of her enemy’s reach. But also got far away from him.

She stayed two years in her country of adoption. Then, came back to our country.

During her absence, her ex started a relationship with one of his friends. But unlike my friend’s relationship, he made his relationship with his friend public. And he went out often with her and the woman he feared and her husband.

My friend saw them in a restaurant, and she immediately understood what was going on. She had a hard time remaining composed, so she avoided them. Later in the night, she received a message from him, saying she looked beautiful, and that he was disappointed she didn’t come to say hello to him. She didn’t respond to that.

Three months later, she met him again in a seminar, but this time, he was alone. She didn’t want to talk to him, because she felt betrayed. But he ran after her and asked her why she was mad at him. My friend exploded and told him how betrayed she felt. He replied to her that their relationship was just not possible and that she should find someone who will make her happy. My friend left the seminar. Two hours later, she received a message from him again, asking her if she was still mad at him. This time, she replied he should leave her alone.

Two weeks passed again, until one night, my friend got awakened by someone who banged on her door. She recognized his voice, and let him in. He took her into his arms, and said he was so happy he could hold her again. He stayed with her the whole night. Yet, the morning after, he went back to his official woman. And my friend became his mistress.

Like another friend of mine who tried everything to forget the man who will never commit to her, my friend tells herself that if she stays long enough with him, she will eventually grow tired of him. “But for now, I just can’t be away from him” she told me.

Yet, her lover doesn’t treat her the right way. If he really cared about her, he wouldn’t let her being only his mistress, only his second best.

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