broken heart, life, love, men, thoughts, women

Jealous of his ex (hard to handle)

Various French newspapers report Valerie Trierweiler, the new first lady in France, is overly jealous of François  Hollande’s ex, Ségolène Royal. Things heated between the two women at a recent meeting where Trierweiler used the numerous cameras in the room to show a peaceful image of the two shaking hands. But later, Royal complained she felt forced to do this.

The first lady of France has been with the newly elected president for 7 years now. Back in 2005, François Hollande was still with  Ségolène Royal, who ran for president in 2007 against Nicolas Sarkozy. During a TV show, Arnaud Montebourg, Royal’s then-ally, said back then that the biggest hurdle for her in the presidency race was his husband, Hollande. But at the time, Hollande wasn’t even thinking about running for the French presidency. Because he was simply lost and went through a desert crossing politically speaking. He was isolated from the socialist Party. In France, he was nicknamed Flamby or fraise des bois, because of his lack of charisma.

In 2011, Hollande came back into the political scene in France when he ran for the election of the socialist candidate for the national presidency race. Royal was also in the race, but she failed to collect enough voices.

So, Trierweiler and Hollande were already seeing each other while he was still with Royal. But the ex was still acting as if her union was solid in 2007. She even told journalists they would get married (they were never married) in 2007.

It was a messy situation from the start.

Their relationship only came to light in 2010. Before, they kept it secret. But it must have been tough for her, because as a journalist, she knew she could be disqualified for dating a politician. Especially since she was specialized in French politics. It wouldn’t be a problem if she reported on finance, sport, culture,…

Plus, Royal is still and will remain in François Hollande’s entourage. Because she’s the mother of their 4 children. And because she belongs to the same world than him. This is not the case for the First Lady. Because journalists are mostly observers. Some people don’t agree with me, because they say journalists and politicians often meet each other. During the day and during evening events.

So, Hollande and Royal keep a bond with each other. And this is difficult to bear for the person who occupies his heart now.

Recently, i read on a forum the comment of a woman who was mad after her man because she found old pictures of his ex in a remote box stocked in his basement. It just shows how difficult it is to cope with our significant other’s love past.

In that case, the ex belongs to the past, especially if the guy has lost all contacts with her.  But here, it’s more difficult, because the ex remains in the picture.

Personally, I think jealousy is poisonous in this situation. And it just gives to the ex exactly what we fear: power.

By being jealous of his ex, we only point out to our significant other that she may be better than us, unfortunately. I don’t know if there’s a good strategy for handling the ex. Mine would simply be to ignore her, just be polite with her if there’s an encounter, and ask him to change subject if he talks about her.

What would you do?


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