celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

The first night disaster

The first night when he invites you at his place is always full of surprises. If he really cares about you, he will try to impress you with his cooking skills, his sense of humor, his personality,…

But sometimes, it doesn’t turn the way he expected it.

I had an ex who ended up in an emergency room because he tried to cook for me but cut deeply his finger. So, instead of a romantic night at his place, we ended up in a hospital where he made a scene because he was afraid of getting stitches for his finger. But that didn’t stop me from dating him, because after this terrible date, we could just laugh about it.

I wasn’t harsh with him for ruining this date. I was more worried than him about his bleeding finger. Because at first, he thought the bleeding would stop. I had to look at it to realize he needed stitches, so I was the one who urged him to go to the emergency room.

Another friend of mine told me she experienced the same first night disaster at home. Her future husband planned a romantic night and took cooking classes weeks before this to be sure he would impress my friend with his cooking skills. But the D-Day, he made mistake over mistake. He spilled the wine on the table, which fell on to my friend’s dress (who had to throw her dress away because the stain never got off), burned the napkin with the candlelight, burned the meal in the oven, and the things he did succeed to cook were “absolutely disgusting” according to my friend. My friend was disappointed by the evening, of course. But when she tried to leave his apartment, he said he really enjoyed her company, and asked her to come and have a drink in the bar not far from his place.

“There’s no easy start for a relationship” she says. I agree with her. I tend to be suspicious with men who make it too easy when you are with them for the first time. This is the sign of someone who’s used to women, aka a womanizer. And usually, they will tell you right away they’re one, by saying something like :”no woman has ever won my heart”  or “I haven’t had a long-term relationship“.

People who are nervous on first occasions like that are genuine.

So, would you forgive him if he ruins your date?


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