broken heart, celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, Uncategorized, women

To follow your heart

Some might say we need the courage to follow our heart. The best example of this might be Steve Jobs in this speech back in 2005.

As he said in his speech, following his heart put him in the path of success, but it wasn’t easy all the way.  Jobs got fired from the company he started, only to come back with a vengeance years later.

Yet, sometimes, our heart can lead us in the wrong path. Because the decision we take with our heart is not rational.

The best example is when we fall in love. We can’t explain why we feel suddenly this urge to be with the person we fall in love. All we want, is to stare at him/her, watching every little move he/she makes, to smell his/her odor, to feel the connection between us, event without saying a word. Objectively, this person is not different from the rest of us. But we get hooked to him/her.

We can do anything to be with the person we love. Yet, this can lead to painful decisions, and when love is over, it leaves you bruised and battered psychologically.

Even if our family and friends (sometimes, only our friends) help us a lot after the break up to get back on track, we just know we’re not fully recovered. Each day, we enter a routine but we know we’re missing something.

To jump in another relationship, called the rebound relationship, only delays this state of mind.

Deep down in our heart, we just want the other to come back into our life.

Yet, some of us choose to test how far we can go with our heart. And it seems there is a limit to our love. Even if death is sometimes the ultimate limit.

In my country, there is a huge debate for the moment because of this interview:

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Her name is Sybille de Selys Longchamps, a former mistress of our former king, and also mother of their child born out of wedlock: Delphine Boël.

For years (between 1966 and 1984), de Selys Longchamps had been living a secret love affair with the then future king. As she said in her interview, they had to meet in places no one could recognize them, so it was often small, remote hotels, not very comfortable or luxurious. “Once, as it was my birthday, I asked him if we could stay in a more comfortable hotel. And he accepted. But when we entered the restaurant of the hotel, I immediately recognized a couple I knew. There was no way we could just walk away because it would have made us guilty of something. So we went to say hello to them, and I just introduced him as my uncle. Back in our room, I shouted at him because I had enough of this situation” she said.

He eventually tried to get divorced to be with her. But there was a condition to this: she wouldn’t be allowed to speak to his three children. Nor the rest of the royal family. “I knew I would be that woman if I accepted. I knew I couldn’t live with that”she said. So, she waved him goodbye.

In other words, she reached the limit of her heart. And that limit was her self-esteem.

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