What happens when you become the confident of the one you love? Is this the sign you lose all of your powers of desire, or the sign your relationship gets into a deeper bond?
Various studies promote the art of listening. If you’re a good listener, people will trust you. It will also help you to find friends and even the one you love.
Because when you ask questions and listen to the responses, you are in a good position to determine if it’s the right person for you. For instance, recently, I went to a date with a guy who started to rant against mixed couples, as he was talking about his recent trip to Singapore where he met a friend of him who’s dating a local there.
Many people told me their story and feel comfortable doing so with me. If they didn’t, I wouldn’t be able to write this blog 😉
But as one woman I met recently told me, it can be tough to be just the listener. She was the PR of a green energy company, which has been through many changes. She said she acted as the shoulder people could cry on, and as a result, she was very tired of it. “It’s like listening to their problems is eating my energy” she added. “And I feel powerless“.
I do understand her, because I get also the impression people come to me as if I know the answer they don’t know. There’s one person in particular in my life who fits into this category right now.
It bothers me because deep in my heart, I wished he would love me. But I just watch him painfully living his life on his side, seducing other women. I don’t feel desirable, and I do compare every man I meet to him. This is not the right help to find the one.
So yes, the friend zone sucks in this case.
And it’s difficult, even almost impossible, to get out of it.
But with time, it is easier to accept it.