When your significant other starts to train for a marathon, should you worry? One of my friends is convinced so. She said her sister, who recently got divorced, didn’t see it coming when her husband told her he was starting to run. He wasn’t running alone. He joined a group of runners to help him get motivated. That should have warned my friend’s sister, because her husband looks like Seth Rogen, aka a teddy bear. Not the athletic type.
That’s how he met “the love of his life”,who’s 20 years older than him.
Personally, I don’t think running is a cause of infidelity. But I read everywhere that when you’re significant other starts to worry about his/her looks, and starts any sport to get in shape, that is a warning sign he/she may be seeing someone else.
But if both of you start the same sport, it can strengthen your couple. One of friends ditched her pilates classes for swimming. She and her future husband decided to swim two times a week, in the swimming pool next to their apartment. In my pilates class, one of my classmates started the lessons with her husband. I’ve never seen them coming apart.
The problem with my friend’s sister is she didn’t join her future ex-husband in his effort to get in shape. Most of couples who broke up like her couple have the same problem. Another friend of mine told me her sister also experienced the same situation. Her ex started to run, and wanted one day to run a marathon. Her sister didn’t want to imitate him. She watched him slowly go away from her, until one day, he told her he wanted to live with someone else.
It’s easy to take a separate path from your significant other. My friend’s sister made the mistake to think it was fine for her husband to start to run, while she would be having fun with her female friends. She was on holiday with her friends, without him, when she learned he was having an affair. Their marriage wasn’t that strong. They started to date while they were in high school, and got married after they finished college. But they never invested in their couple.
I don’t say you have to be attached at the hip with your significant other. But I’ve noticed, for couples who are still together after a long time, that they usually find some common activities to do together. It can be cooking classes (I’ve seen many couples there), planning their travels around the world, sport, marathon, … anything they can share together. That’s why it’s important to share some common tastes with your significant other.