broken heart, celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

Dating a depressed mind


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Physically, a depressed boyfriend or girlfriend is there with you, but his/her mind is locked miles away.

For those who share their life with a depressed mind, it can be really difficult. Because he/she doesn’t meet your needs. Some of us begin to feel guilty because we try hard to overpower the sadness of the one we love. But no matter how hard we try, it seems there’s no response from our significant other.

If your needs are not met, you can feel angry toward your love one.

One of my friends is currently dating a depressed man. She’s just moved in with him in a new house, but she complains he has shut down since they lived together. “He’s lonely even if I’m just standing next to him. I feel powerless, because I know he’s sad, but I’m not able to change his mind” she says. Unfortunately for my friend, her boyfriend lost his job shortly after they moved in together, and she’s the one who pays the rent of their house, and also all the other expenses in their life. His depression started just after he lost his job. And despite my friend’s help, he hasn’t been able to find a new job, because nothing motivates him. My friend says she can’t leave him, because he would end up in the street. But my friend seems to forget her boyfriend has a family who is also worried about him.

Maybe my friend should leave him. Even if she loves him. If we love someone, really love someone, we should be able to let him/her go away. Some people need to hit the bottom of their life to bounce back. Leaving someone we love isn’t the same as getting rid of him/her. If she cares about him, she can tell him she’s at his side no matter how. I have a friend who’s also under a rough patch, and though I can’t help him, I told him he could call me or ask me anything he wants if he needs.  So far, he hasn’t hesitated to call me or ask to come at my place just for a coffee and a chat, because he needs to talk to me. I see him getting better.

We can’t force the people we love to change.

Eventually, depressed people will heal their mind.

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