broken heart, celibacy, dating site, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

The needed distance


On the app Tinder, I’ve found quite a lot of men I know more or less, because they are either a public figure, or because they have common friends with me on Facebook, or even are friend with me on Facebook. As the app is based on our geolocation, it’s not a surprise to see some people we know who are either looking for a relationship or just looking for a hookup (married or not).

I tend to stop over profiles who have either some common likes with me, or who have common friends with me on Tinder. I can’t pick some random strangers out of luck and start a conversation with them. But I have swiped left all public figures and even the men I know personally. There were two of my former coworkers in that list, and a professional contact I call from time to time. I know I can always contact them on Facebook if I change my mind.

A friend of mine asked me if I can avoid them if a relationship comes and go, as it’s difficult to cope a breakup with our ex if he/she a coworker working in the same floor, same building than us.

As if these relationships are all ill-fated. Yes, relationships can turn sour and end. But some last a long time. In my office, there are three couples who met at work. All of them are married and it’s been a while since they started to date each other. Two former couples are over, but my coworkers didn’t have to avoid their ex, because their ex left the office when they were still together. Yet, they have children with them, and they are forced to remain friends with their ex. But they have moved over and married to other people so it’s not difficult for them.

The office is the number one place to find love. Because we can grow a strong bond with a coworker who is located very near to us and always available for a coffee. This kind of relationship takes time. So people are not taking it very lightly.  If there is a womanizer among your coworker, you will probably know about it before he can start his moves on you. Your other coworkers play an important role in your search for love, by silently validating your union.

Nothing lasts forever though. And some office couples do break up.  If you have the chance to work for a company that send you abroad or to multiple seminars, you can avoid seeing your ex. For other people , it’s best to stay away for some time, taking a long holiday, to move over.

Break up are sometimes hard to stomach. Especially if you were left for someone else. I went through that, and even if my ex wasn’t a coworker, I see him a lot because we are involved in the same professional circles. It’s painful, but I survived.


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