life, love, relationships

The age difference


lolita

In France, there’s a hot topic right now since the revelation from Vanessa Spinoza about the writer who used to be celebrated in intellectual circles. The scandal has triggered since the publish of Vanessa Spinoza’s book. But when I was a teenager, I reminded one of my teachers who warned us about the male writer and to never read any of his books.

I’ve read that age difference will be more suspected in the future because of this scandal. So what’s age difference is okay, and what’s not?

In general, a huge age difference in a relationship is not a good idea, because you don’t share any common experience with your significant other. Yet, it’s possible that an old man can fall in love with someone who’s 40 years younger than him. Some say it’s just dementia.

The new object of love of Silvio Berlusconi is 30, while he’s 83. Needless to say, when he was 50, she wasn’t born yet. And she doesn’t seem disgusted by him. But she’s 30, and an adult. So she may know why she has chosen him.

There are maybe other reasons why young people are attracted to much older people. It’s a question of fortune, network, fame, … But it’s not guaranteed to last forever, because old people die before them, in general.

That’s the problem with a much older significant other than you. Don’t forget he/she will age not well, and that diseases, cancers, vascular accidents,… can happen when we are old.

And besides, if you’re after his/her heritage, don’t forget there maybe other members of his/her family after that too.

Karl Lagerfeld, the deceased stylist, didn’t left anything to anyone around him, except to his cat, Choupette.

In the case of Vanessa Spinoza, she was a teenager, when she met the old writer. At that age, it’s not difficult to be influenced, especially if you come from a broken family.  One of my friends has a teenager. My friend is divorced but she looks after her daughter very well and doesn’t like when her “friends” treats her badly. My friend is very honest and direct with her daughter. And it’s important.

I have a niece who’s still a child. But when she will be a teenager, I guess I will be very honest with her and warning her about her relationships. Nowadays, teenagers are also the object of harassment on social media. I hope my niece will never experience this.

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