broken heart, celibacy, life, love, Music, relationships, thoughts

Hello (call your ex)

Six women out of ten are inspired to call their ex after listening to Adele’s latest song, “Hello”. Even the Instagram Star, @thefatjewish, joked about this.

 

 

Is there any other singer able to do so?  Several studies have shown listening to music can influence us in various ways. But there’s a difference between feeling something thanks to music and wanting to call your ex.

Besides, this was a question asked to 41.000 people by the date auction site Whatsyourprice.com, which allows you to buy for love or a first date. Eeew, is this a site like “Seekingarrangement”,… ?  So this is just a survey, by a site not very reliable. And people often lie when they are asked a question on their personal life.

Personally, I don’t think a song can inspire women to call their ex. Especially one from Adele. But if this song is associated with a special moment you shared with your ex, it may influence you.

When we read this statistic with my friends, we were all laughing. Nobody wanted to call her/his ex after listening to “Hello”.

In fact, I hear more stories of people calling their ex after seeing pictures of their ex on Facebook, especially those where they seem to enjoy themselves with other people (hello, “Hotline bling” 😉

Personally, if I feel like calling my ex, I always have second thoughts. After all, if things didn’t work in the past, why would it work now?

Advertisements
Standard
celibacy, life, love, men, miscellaneous, Music, relationships, thoughts, women

High fidelity

In the book High Fidelity, Rob Fleming, the main character, judges the others by the music they listen. He and his clerks are basically music snobs who just despise the clients who have a shitty taste for music in their shop.

Recently, I had a conversation with one of my colleagues about our musical tastes, and it reminded me of this book. He’s into opera, while I don’t know much about it, but he doesn’t have a clue about alternative and rock music, while I do. So, he asked me what kind of music I was listening to, and when I gave him the name of the bands I enjoy the records, he just looked at me as if I was speaking chinese or something like that.

I don’t know why, but I don’t like to talk about my musical taste, especially when I know the other people don’t know anything about Tool or Queens of the Stone Age (except three of my friends, no one in my entourage has ever heard of those bands, yup). Music is something personal, everyone has a different taste on this. Besides, there’s so many different categories, groups, artists, … that it’s impossible to know everything in this area.

One of my friends think it’s important to share the same taste in music with your partner. “I once dated a guy who listened to the crappiest pop music on this planet, like  those Romanians who sang  on a plane, I think the name of the band was O-zone or something like that, and I thought to myself what a jerk he was. I noticed that often, shitty taste for music goes hand in hand with a crappy personality too. So, for me, it’s definitely a criteria for picking a man” she said.

Another said that it’s best when your mutual tastes for music are not too far from each other. “Don’t forget that if you plan to live with him, you will have to bear his music, so, it’s best when it doesn’t offend your ears. How could you stand a guy who listen to metal and stuffs like that while you’re into classical music?” she said.

Another friend of mine said she doesn’t care at all about the musical taste of her potential partner. “If he has all the qualities I look for in man, this is purely a detail that should be ignored” she said.

So, would you reject someone because he/she doesn’t listen to the same kind of music than you?

Standard
broken heart, celibacy, life, love, men, Music, relationships, thoughts, women

Daddy’s gone

Our relationship with our parents determines a lot our future love life. For women, the bond we have with our father plays an important role in our choice of men. But some women haven’t had the chance (or have the luck) to know their father. Either because their mom chose to raise them on their own, because they were an “accident” and the biological father didn’t want to take his responsibilities, either because their parents divorced when they were young and because their father just disappeared into nature/ started a new family with another woman and neglected his past one. “My parents divorced when I was three, and he moved to another country, so I barely remember anything from him. Especially since he didn’t want to keep contact with me. I haven’t received any single letter, phone call, … from him since he was gone” P., 35, said.”My father was a pathetic loser, but I ignored completely his existence until once, my mom told me the truth about him. I needed to know who he was, so I did a bit of researches, and found him. My mom didn’t want to tell me how he was, just that she met him in a bar and got accidentally pregnant when they slept together. For me, it was a shock, I couldn’t imagine he would be so pathetic since my mom did a wonderful job raising me on her own”R., 31, said. “My father died in an accident when I was one year old” L., 34, said.

How does the lack of a father figure affect our love life? A friend of mine, who was raised by her mom, admits her choice of dating older men than her is linked with her relationship with her dad. “My father, well, I was glad my mom got rid of him when I was four. I have a really low esteem for him. For me, he’s just a loser. A few years ago, he wanted to come back into our lives, but I pleaded my mom not to take him back, and she didn’t” she said. “In my love life, I go unconsciously for much older men than me. When I was 16, I was dating a men who had 35 and two children. Now, my man is 52 , and has also two lovely daughters. I want an accomplished man, who’s the exact opposite of my father” she said. I., 32, admits she looks for someone who will be “her father, her confident, her lover and her friend”. My mom left my dad when I was five, because he was abusive and violent with her. I promised to myself at that age I would never marry a man like him. Now, I can disqualify a man just because he lost temporarily his temper” she said.

The lack of a father can also affect our self-esteem, and have disastrous consequences on our love life. “I never knew my father. My mom decided to keep me while he wanted her to abort, and he disappeared into nature after I was born. I suffered a lot of not having a father, and I had a really low self-esteem when I was younger. My love life was a catastrophe. I dated only men who weren’t good for me and who kept on tormenting my heart, until one day, I decided to go to therapy” O., 36, said.

So, does you relationship with your father influence your taste in men? And for men reading this, does the way your father treat your mother affect your love life?

 

Standard
humor, life, love, men, miscellaneous, Music, thoughts, video, wacky, women

Start wearing purple

According to newspapers, this man below is in line with this  year fashion trends.
dsc00437.jpg
Why? Because he wears purple (his hair colour), this year Autumn/Winter colour.

To be more accurate, the Autumn/Winter 2008  fashion trend is to be copied from this group.

And in particular, from his lead singer, Eugene Hütz, the Pied Piper of Hutzovina.

Gosh, this man makes me want to drink vodka heavily with him and dance on the table… (sigh).

Note that the moustache isn’t out of fashion yet, unfortunately.

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months” wrote Oscar Wilde. How right was he.

Here’s the question of the day: is there any fashion style that makes you run away? And have you ever disqualified a potential companion because of his/her look?

Standard
celibacy, life, love, men, Music, relationships, sex, video, wacky, women

Not a crime?

Recently, a French swimming champion got badly served with nude photos of her displayed in the medias. Apparently, these indelicate pictures were leaked by her ex-fiance. How nice of him.

When people break up, either they choose to keep it civil, either they try to ignore each other, or they just dive into a battle of revenge. It depends a lot on if we’re acrimonious or not, but also on how the relationship ended.

How do we take revenge on our ex? There are different ways. One of my friends, who got dumped by one of the douchiest men in the world, “sort” her ex’s apartment when he was at work. “I still had the keys of his apartment after we broke up, and as I knew his habits and schedule, I just sneaked into his apartment to do a little sorting. He was a maniac, very tidy, so I basically put everything out of its place and left. I felt really relieved after this” she said.

Then, there’s the kiss and tell. An ex-friend of mine used to talk shit on his ex’s once it was over, even if they don’t deserve it. In fact, none of his ex’s deserved that. He was criticizing the way they kiss, their choice of clothes, perfume, their new guys, how bad they were in bed,… He did this even if he broke up with them. I asked him why he had to do this everytime it was over, and he just replied that I should stop being such a feminist (!). You can now imagine why I’m not friend with him anymore…

Women too are able to bash their ex lovers like that. Another friend of mine (which isn’t a true misogynist for a change) once dated a woman he thought at first was absolutely charming.” I invited her to the restaurant, and by the time the dishes arrived at our table, she had managed to criticize every of her ex’s, revealing very intimate details about them I didn’t want to know. I just paid the bill and never called her back afterwards” he said. “I could imagine her talking like that about me, and this really turned me off” he added.

For sure, dating such people warns you you could be the next on the list.

In the different forms of revenge on your ex, kiss and tell is probably one of the meanest ways to do this. The worst is of course when you start to hurt physically your ex, or imitate Lorena Bobbit. But revealing intimate details about your ex is a betrayal. There’s nothing worse than to be betrayed by someone you loved (or had feelings for). And it just shows how insecure you are.

So, would you do that to your ex? And would you date someone who has such a reputation?

 

Standard