life, love, relationships

Is Tinder going to end?

Esther Perel, a relationship therapist, says Tinder won’t last.

 ‘I’ve yet to find anyone who tells me that dating on any app is fun. Nobody tells me that it’s playful or mischievous – it is utterly uninspired, devoid of imagination, seduction, charge or excitement. It’s just romantic consumerism.

And when people do go on a date, it’s like a job interview’

It may be not that fun, but some people do meet their significant other thanks to Tinder and other dating apps.

When we use Tinder and other dating app, we rely on their algorithm to find people who can meet our needs. Some people use dating app to find a turnover of lovers. Some people use dating app to find their partner.

Like Esther Perel says, when people go on a date, it’s like they attend a job interview. The first date is always awkward because of that. But we don’t look for the same thing during a job interview.  In a job interview, we often put our skills and experiences forward.  Sometimes, we also mention our athletic feat, like our time during a marathon. During a date, we don’t give those details. But it’s true, in both cases, that we want to be liked.

It’s not necessarily a bad thing.

In the end, we always have the choice of taking the chance to pursue a relationship with our date or not.

So, Tinder is just a way to meet people.

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celibacy, life, love, men, relationships, thoughts, women

A kiss on the first date

Is it ok to kiss on the first date? It depends. I’ve been to many dates where I was not sure at all about the man I had in front of me. I’ve only kissed one of my dates on the first date because I found him so sexy with his blue shirt and I felt secured with him. After all, we all look for someone attractive.

Most of the time, I’ve waited at least until the third date to kiss, to evaluate our interactions and our compatibility.  I also believe that men who can wait and still date me until the third date are interested in me. One of my friends told me she considers rude when a man pushes to interact physically on the first date. “It could mean he’s just interested in having sex with you” she says.

Unfortunately, there are no rules when it comes to kiss on the first date. One of my friends told me he kissed his date on the first date, and so far, they are still going strong, after two years.

I guess the best way to decide if you want to kiss on the first date is to listen to your gut. If you don’t feel any spark after the first date, where we are supposed to be at our best, maybe it’s the sign it’s not going well. But if you feel a spark, and want to wait to kiss your date, it’s ok.

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