life, men, relationships, thoughts, women

Different needs?

Getting your ex back

Recently, a scandal broke in France about some male journalists who created a Facebook group to mock bloggers, artists, journalists,… Especially female ones. Immediately, some articles about how some male journalists created a group on Slack called the Darrons or #radioBièreFoot. Those groups were just awful with female, especially young ones, journalists.

But it just says collaboration between male and female coworkers is still difficult nowadays. Before World War II, women were not a force in companies. They were most of the time housewives, who depended on their husband. My grandmothers were housewives. They raised my uncles, aunts, mother and father while taking care of the house. But no one of my aunts or mother is a housewife. They were or are still working for a hospital, a bank, a school. No one complained how difficult it was to work, but my mother, for example, was working with other women in her team. Even her boss was female. The same goes for my aunts.

It’s not my case. Even if during my college years, there were more women than men studying with me, in my professional career, I’m still a minority. As my profession is mostly a male one.

When I started to work, there was a scandal in my company about a guy who used to go to Thailand and Morocco and proposed BDSM, golden shower, and other joys, to women while promising them to marry them. Of course, he never married, but he collected pictures of his trophies, and shared it with his coworkers. It ended because one of the brothers of one of his victims recognized him and sued him. My coworker was fired because of that. But his male coworkers were not shocked by his attitude. They just found it funny.  Female employees in my company were just “stupid”, “desperate”, … Not very respected. Fortunately, some of those who were disrespectful either left or were let go and were replaced either by women or men who are respectful to everybody. There were just left two guys who flirted openly with the young female coworkers. During our office parties, one of them screamed he wanted to fuck X or Y, much to our dismay, and to the stupefaction of X or Y. Luckily, after many complaints to our HR, he was let go. The other one left us because he wanted to pursue other goals.

There are still tensions between opposite sex. Because we pursue different goals.  Women in general want equality, while men want to conquer. It ‘s difficult because of this.

 

 

 

 

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broken heart, celibacy, life, love, men, rant, relationships, thoughts, women

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

… Just a little bit :mrgreen:

Recently, I had a huge fight with – again- one of my professional contacts, who happens to get on my nerves all of the time. Since I know him, we’ve always had arguments. But this time, it was a little bit different. He called me because he was mad at me for writing an article not so kind about his company, and threatened me to blacklist me if I kept on writing such sensationalist articles like that. I replied that my article was biased because no one in his company dared to answer my questions. Then I told him that I didn’t know who to call, because it was such a technical problem, and I was sure he wasn’t able to answer the questions. He paused, then admitted I was right, and hung up. One hour later, he called me back, and asked me if everything was OK between us. He added that he didn’t want to lose our kindly relationship. It left me speechless.

Three days later, I met one of my coworkers who knows him very well. He said that I was just a bitch, and that no one has ever dared to talk to him like that. So, yes, I’m a bitch. But I’m proud of it. I don’t like to be humiliated. And with him, honestly, I’m really tired of fighting all the time. I don’t like to fight. It’s not good for my karma.

This makes me think: do we have to go toe to toe with our lover?

One of my friends says yes. “H. loves me because he says I’m the only woman who manages to go toe to toe with him. Before me, no one has ever had the guts to do so, because he’s such a pain in the ass, as he says”. My friend is just responding to him whenever he pulls a temper tantrum or attacks her because he’s angry. And she says that by just doing this, very calm, she manages to bring down the tension very rapidly between them. I guess they’re a bit the yin and the yang to each other.

I think it’s important not to lose yourself in a relationship and stands for what you believe. It’s not because you’re honest and frank that your lover would run away. If he/she does, then, he/she’s simply not for you. But there’s a thin line between standing against him in an argument or just go toe to toe with his charachter, and castrate him. Words can do deep damages in a relationship. A little bit of diplomacy is sometimes more helpful to bring down the tensions than harsh words like “you’re such a loser” or “I’d rather sleep with the first man I see in the street than you. You disgust me”. These words can ruin forever your relationship. Bear that in mind.

So, how do you make yourself respected in a relationship?

 

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